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On a list filled with stunningly handsome, incredibly rich men, how does a goofy-looking pipsqueak of a bartender manage to take the top spot? Because he’s the best guy any of the four ladies ever dated, that’s why. On paper, Steve and Miranda made no sense together, but they shared a great spark (and great sex), and his fun-loving personality helped Miranda to loosen up a bit, which she sorely needed. He was a doting father to Brady, and he was always loyal and loving to Miranda. (Again, we’re not counting what happens in the movies, but his infidelity in the first one came out of nowhere and felt tacked on just to give Miranda a storyline.) Even the “just a bartender” complaint went away when he took the initiative to open up his own bar. Looking back, Miranda was the only one of the four women to end up with the guy who was best suited to her. Congratulations, Miranda: You snagged yourself a good one.

Not all vegans are animal rights activists, and not all animal rights activists are bad. But if this is a big enough part of his personality for him to be labelled as “the vegan guy” in your mental fuckboy list, then he definitely possesses the worst qualities of these two groups. T

“If a guy keeps a list, he’s doing it possibly as a way to feel good about himself to some extent,” says Hartman. “What guy doesn’t want to be able to convince a woman to sleep with him? It makes him feel good, like, ‘Yeah, I achieved something positive with women.’”

“The only exception would be if somehow the list is creating some kind of negative feeling for you as a guy, making you feel inadequate because you don’t think your list is long enough or colorful enough.”